Thursday, May 24, 2012

Dollar Dreams!!!


So, I am not talking about today, or yesterday... I am talking about a year ago.. I know its lame for me to write about last year when so much has happened this year itself. But I thought, Last year was not bad either..and since I was out of my blog for quite a while now, I have lots of catching up to do. It has been a roller coaster ride. first one being my Onsite...I was the lucky one to survived the lash of RFE denials or Visa Denials at the consulate and H1 meant to me more than anything else as I got it with lot of struggle, argued, fought, escalated, cribbed, convinced that I was capable and then, I was given...that too, after 4.years. I was all set to step into the dream land and chase my dollar dreams.

While sending me off, everyone was in tears except me...I knew I needed to go, earn enough for my wedding, return and then get married. I bade good bye to my loved ones and entered USA. I assumed US to be like what they show in movies, sky scrapers, rappers on the street, street painting, glitz, glamour whatever!. I reached Bentonville and felt like I reached my home town. The airport looked like a mini bus stand and the weather was pretty hot. I came to collect my baggage and was surprised to find that conveyer belt didn’t have any luggage. I was warned that, in that airport, we might miss the luggage and we can get it only the next day or day after... luckily, the airport personnel brought my luggage and handed it over to me. I took a cab and went straight to my room. In the cab, I felt dizzy and a strange feeling of “I might meet with an accident” cropped in to my head.. I felt like the car coming towards me is definitely gonna hit me and I started cursing the cab driver that she didn’t know how to drive. Moments later I realised that they drive in the other direction. goshh!! infact, they operated very differently..driving to the left, the switches are upside down. plug points are nearer to the floor, they call the ground floor as the first floor and so on. It took time to understand but it was creepy initially.

First day at my work, I just stared at everyone who was passing by me. they were so tall and well built or overly built. they were of all colours and types, by colour I don’t just mean the skin tone, the hair, the eye ball, everything was so colourful about them :D....and they always had this cute habit of smiling... it made me like them instantly. right from the security guard to the client, I found everyone was very friendly, punctual and straight forward. people say, south of USA is very friendly and I second that. I saw people in NY, they are so busy with their life they don’t apologize even when they crash into one another. they just run, run and run for their life. in that aspect, I loved the place I was living in. it’s very calm and laid back.


I had this notion about Americans that they are very forward and independent. That’s why they change partners and don’t worry much about it but I realised that that’s not always true. I used to go for walk in this park where there used to be really old couples who come for a walk. once I came across a couple, one of whom was on wheel chair and her husband was pushing it. she showed him the pool and told something and the old man instantly chuckled and kissed the lady. I thought, that was most romantic moment I have ever witnessed. befriended their dog in order to talk to them and after our initial exchange of greetings, the couple told me that they have been married for 40years. I wondered if one can endure so many hardships and mishaps and still continue to love a person timelessly. I realised one thing, it’s not about the place, it’s the people who make any relationship work. of course the way we grow up also plays its part. when things go bad, these people can’t take it and they feel before they turn worse, it’s time to move on and give each other space they deserve and in turn peace of mind. we in India, fight, bad mouth, bang something, at times everything, and after we are done, cool down and realise that we are wrong and we should give it another try and as time passes by, there are these innumerable attempts  we would have made to stay together. how many of us have seen our parents say "I love you" and for that matter anything of that sort. I didn’t!! does not mean that they don’t have love for each other.. just that they don’t express and they take each other for granted. I love the fact that we have better success rate in marriage than any other place but I wish we were a little more expressive and vocal about our feelings. not just with couples but in any relationship. a few good words can make or mar a person's life and who knows you might even make one's day and be remembered forever.

oops! where did I go, coming back to my stay, The biggest disappointment was our desi crowd :P... I have seen “nosy” people, “bitchy” people, “jealous” people, “why the fuck will I care people”, “good that it happened to you” people. It was a very good learning lesson for me not to trust anyone and everyone who comes in my way and always have a plan B for every plan A that you wanna make. Those 7 months made me stronger with respect to my personal life. How much to expect from others, how to behave with others. What to tell others, one point here is people don’t really care if you were happy or sad, they are just interested in what is happening in your life so that they get some fodder to spread rumours about you.

Ofcourse, I did have good times too!!!. I had all the time in world to jog, I covered Bentonville by walk, may be 30 times. Every day, I used to go for walks for about 2hrs and I just loved it. The Friday lunches, especially Thai food ... occasional visits to KFC..wandering aimlessly in Wal-Mart, try to cook food and making all my friends as guinea pigs to taste them, Video chats with my close friends.. loved it... loved my freedom..one thing, I am missing right now.
I had only one thing in my mind when I entered US, Money,  but I was given so many memories, both good and bad, I also met a few special people who have been supportive and caring in true sense. It didn’t matter to them if I was single or engaged, if I was fat, too tall or dark.. it didn’t matter if I cooked well or sucked at it! I had freedom to be myself with them and I am thankful that I met them.  I packed my bags and all the memories along with them and said my final good bye to the place and the people. A place I might never ever return again...